Monday, September 23, 2013
Friday, September 20, 2013
Dear Friday, I never thought you would get here! It has been an incredibly long week and it is so good to finally see the weekend. Dear School, I cannot believe it is just 5 more weeks until school is over! Man time has flown by. The end has been a long time coming. Dear Tennessee, I am loving the cooler temperatures. I am loving the cool crisp mornings. I can feel fall just around the corner. Dear Husband, I am keeping my fingers crossed for your potential job. Praying that if it is God’s will everything will work out.
Thursday, September 19, 2013
I have been pouring over pregnancy, fertility, and TTC (trying to conceive) websites, boards, and books over the past few months. In my reading I have found a few things that I have made me go “huh.”
First of all the woman’s body is (usually) a toxic environment for sperm. Because of the acidic nature of the vaginal vault sperm cannot thrive in that environment. The sperm thrive in alkaline environments. This means that my body is prepared to kill the little swimmers within an hour or two of entering my body.
The good news is that right before ovulation a women’s cervical mucus will turn alkaline and will create a more “friendly” environment for sperm. All the baby boards call this cervical mucus EWCM or egg white mucus. It looks like and has the consistency of egg white: clear, thick, and stretchy. Have I grossed you out yet?
The bad news…..when this happens it only allows for a maximum of 5 days (but could be closer to 2 or 3 days) every cycle for me to get knocked up.
In my reading I have found that there are a number of things that you can do to increase your chances of getting pregnant. But nothing that is a sure fire way to make it magically happen. Some of the things that can increase your chances are: charting your basal body temperature (which can get old really fast), use ovulation predictor kits, and charting your cervical mucus. And of course the internet is filled with all kinds of advice on things you can do. Heck the internet even tells you how you can increase your chances of either having a boy or girl. But all these things do not guarantee anything.
So bottom line is…..when you do get pregnant it is a miracle.
I have had thoughts of just giving up and going back on birth control. Drink as much coffee as I want all day and take up smoking. Because that is when everyone else seems to get pregnant.
Wednesday, September 18, 2013
Fall is by far my favorite time of the year. Some of the things that I love most are:
Driving through the mountains and seeing the beautiful fall colors.
A yummy pumpkin spice latte from Starbucks.
Cool mornings sitting out on the deck with a cup of coffee and a blanket.
I love all the sites and smells of fall. I love everything fall brings.
And of course the best part of fall is…..my birthday! I love the fact that my birthday is during October. Perhaps that is why I love fall so much.
Monday, September 16, 2013
It is interesting how friendships change and evolve over time. Often those changes come when we have changes within our individual lives. The true test of a friendship is whether or not it can last through changes that happen along the way. When changes occur in our life or the life of our friend can we adapt and accept the change that it could bring to our friendship. Are we willing to make sacrifices that could be required in order to keep and maintain that relationship? Are we willing to except those changes and know that our friendship may not be the way it was before? Are we willing to swallow our pride and selfishness to maintain our friendships? The true test is learning how to change with the changes that come our way.
Throughout my life some of my friendships have been faced with changes and challenges. I have had to learn to adapt and change when the lives of my friends have changed. One of the hardest lessons I have had to learn is how to accept those life changes when I myself so desire to be where they are in life. When a friend gets married and we are still single we desire to know that same joy that they are experiencing. What we do not realize is how marriage can change a friendship. But as a true friend we must learn how to adapt and be happy for our friend’s new life and learn how we fit into this new life they have.
The same is true when our friends have babies. A baby brings on a whole new dynamic and while our friend is experiencing this new chapter in our life it is hard to see where we now fit in. This summer a good friend of mine had a baby and while I am extremely happy for her it is hard to know where I fit in. I have had moments where I wonder do I fight for this friendship or not. My friend’s life has forever been changed and she herself is not the same person she was months ago before the baby arrived. I also wonder what I can offer her the fact that I have not kids yet. Do we still have things in common? The hardest part is learning how to except the fact that she has a baby when I myself desire to have a baby. I have struggled with feeling jealous and accepting these changes that are happening in her life. How do you put aside your own wants and desire for the good of the friendship? How do you change so that you can still have a friendship with your friend? How do you be a friend when you have feelings of jealousy toward your friend and you fear that things between you and your friend may never be the same? My prayer is that God will show me what kind of friend to be and to learn how to accept those things that I cannot control. And to understand that my friends needs are not the same as they once were. I need to learn to reach out and be the one that bridges the gap in where our friendship is now.
Friday, September 13, 2013
I am so glad that it is finally Friday. This has been a long, hard week. I did not think the weekend would ever arrive. The hardest part about this week was saying goodbye to our cat. We made the painful decision of having her put to sleep. After finding out she was suffering from liver failure it seemed like the right thing to do to go ahead and put her out of her misery. It was a hard decision, but in the end I know it was the right thing to do. She will always have a special place in our hearts.
Wednesday, September 11, 2013
Only six more weeks of graduate school! I cannot believe how fast time has gone. It seems like it was just yesterday that I started the program and now the end is drawing near. I can hardly wait to be done. It will be a good feeling once I am done and I can relax and enjoy life again.
Tuesday, September 3, 2013
Many of us have a special furry someone in our lives. Some have a dog, some have a cat, some may even have both. No matter what, that special furry someone somehow finds a way into our hearts and we bond with these little ones. They become our friends when we are lonely or sad. They make us laugh and have a way of putting a smile on our face. They love us unconditionally because we give them a home, food, and a place in our hearts.
The hard thing about owning a pet is knowing when it is time to let go and allow them to be at peace. It is hard to see our little ones suffer and it is hard to make that decision when it is time to say goodbye. Because as much as it hurts we know in our hearts sometimes it is the best thing.
Soon I am going to have to say goodbye to one of my furry little friends. As much as it hurts I know it is time to let go and let her be at peace. She will be missed, but never forgotten. Reagan you have been such a great cat! You will always have a special place in our hearts.