Friday, October 4, 2013

Hashi what…….

butterfly

About a year ago I was diagnosed with hypothyroidism. Over the past year I have felt like I have been on a roller coaster. I feel like I have had my good days and my bad days. And as my doctor has increased my medication over time I have really not felt like the physical manifestation of disease has changed all that much. There have been times where I have had the same symptoms and felt the same way I did a year ago when I was first diagnosed. So I thought it was time to take matters into my own hands. I insisted that when my doctor do my blood work again that they also check out my thyroid antibodies as well. So it turns out that my levels were elevated and that I have Hashimoto’s. If you are not familiar with that, Hashimoto’s is an autoimmune disease and it is basically where your immune system has decided that your thyroid is a foreign invader and attacks it. When my doctor told me this she had the attitude that well this is what is wrong with you and so you just have to live with it. But I refuse to have that type of mentality. So I have set out on my own crusade to advocate for my health and happiness. I am going to find what works for me and kick Hashimoto’s in the butt!

I recently ran across this letter. It is written by Gena Lee Nolin and she posted it on her Thyroid Sexy Facebook page. If you are not familiar with Hashimoto’s these are some of the things that myself and others with this disease suffer with on a daily basis.

Hi. My name is Hashimoto's. I'm an invisible autoimmune disease that attacks your thyroid gland causing you to become hypothyroid. I am now velcroed to you for life.

Others around you can't see me or hear me, but YOUR body feels me.

I can attack you anywhere and any way I please.

I can cause severe pain or, if I'm in a good mood, I can just cause you to ache all over.

Remember when you and energy ran around together and had fun?

I took energy from you, and gave you exhaustion. Try to have fun now.

I can take good sleep from you and in its place, give you brain fog and lack of concentration.

I can make you want to sleep 24/7, and I can also cause insomnia.

I can make you tremble internally or make you feel cold or hot when everyone else feels normal.

I can also give you swollen hands and feet, swollen face and eyelids, swollen everything.

I can make you feel very anxious or very depressed, too. I can also cause other mental health problems.

I can make your hair fall out, become dry and brittle, cause acne, cause dry skin, the sky is the limit with me.

I can make you gain weight and no matter what you eat or how much you exercise, I can keep that weight on you. I can also make you lose weight. I don't discriminate.

Some of my other autoimmune disease friends often join me, giving you even more to deal with.

If you have something planned, or are looking forward to a great day, I can take that away from you. You didn't ask for me. I chose you for various reasons:

That virus or viruses you had that you never really recovered from, or that car accident, or maybe it was the years of abuse and trauma (I thrive on stress.) You may have a family history of me. Whatever the cause, I'm here to stay.

I hear you're going to see a doctor to try and get rid of me. That makes me laugh. Just try. You will have to go to many, many doctors until you find one who can help you effectively.

You will be put on the wrong medication for you, pain pills, sleeping pills, energy pills, told you are suffering from anxiety or depression, given anti-anxiety pills and antidepressants.

There are so many other ways I can make you sick and miserable, the list is endless - that high cholesterol, gall bladder issue, blood pressure issue, blood sugar issue, heart issue among others? That's probably me.

Can't get pregnant, or have had a miscarriage?

That's probably me too.

Teeth and gum problems? TMJ? I told you the list was endless.

You may be given a TENs unit, get massaged, told if you just sleep and exercise properly I will go away.

You'll be told to think positively, you'll be poked, prodded, and MOST OF ALL, not taken seriously when you try to explain to the endless number of doctors you've seen, just how debilitating I am and how sick you really feel. In all probability you will get a referral from these 'understanding' (clueless) doctors, to see a psychiatrist.

Your family, friends and co-workers will all listen to you until they just get tired of hearing about how I make you feel, and just how debilitating I am.

Some of them will say things like "Oh, you are just having a bad day" or "Well, remember, you can't do the things you use to do 20 YEARS ago", not hearing that you said 20 DAYS ago.

They'll also say things like, "if you just get up and move, get outside and do things, you'll feel better." They won't understand that I take away the 'gas' that powers your body and mind to ENABLE you to do those things.

Some will start talking behind your back, they'll call you a hypochondriac, while you slowly feel that you are losing your dignity trying to make them understand, especially if you are in the middle of a conversation with a "normal" person, and can't remember what you were going to say next. You'll be told things like, "Oh, my grandmother had that, and she's fine on her medication" when you desperately want to explain that I don't impose myself upon everyone in the exact same way, and just because that grandmother is fine on the medication SHE'S taking, doesn't mean it will work for you.

The only place you will get the kind of support and understanding in dealing with me is with other people that have me. They are really the only ones who can truly understand.

I am Hashimoto's Disease.

2 comments:

  1. Oh friend, I'm SO sorry. My mom has an autoimmune disease, and so does my best friend (lupus). I am praying for you!

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    1. Thank you Michaela! I do apprecaite your prayers. It is no fun, but at least now I know what is wrong and I can work toward finding ways to get better.

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